The ISFP type presents some strange dichotomies. On the one hand they are retiring, shy, peaceful, and on the other, they seem to be some of the biggest bullies around. It is almost like they hold the prospect of ENTJ inside themselves as well as their own type, the pussy type. Tough pussies.
Some of the most dick-suckable men lie at this type, the men that are just so attractive and pretty, yet masculine. Pretty boys. And they are somehow sensitive to women, know just what women want and yet are not pansies or wimps either. They can be like that type of sensitive stud guy that a women goes gaga over.
They can be mouthy and challenging or just totally quiet and retiring. Choleric or phlegmatic. And of course sanguine too as their general SP backdrop suggests.
An ISFP can be very athletic and dedicated to a sport or craft or total and utter losers, dropouts and stoners. Like all those rock rebels. Or they can be on the other side of the high school fence and be the bullying jocks who fuck with the weaker less athletic and dorky kids.
They can be utterly cool or be pretty unhip and kind of ISTJish uncool. George Harrison comes to mind. They can be weird and very subjective. They seem to form a very subjective picture of the world and themselves.
ISFPs all tend to respond to heaviness and harshness. They can take a lot of it, whether they are dispensing it or they are on the receiving end of it. They’re very resilient and tough. They can be the members of a rock group that kind of function like glue, keeping it together in a quiet and smoldering way. They are like a smoldering flame. Many of them have little apparent ego. They just go on doing their thing and they usually have some one thing that they are good at such as playing guitar really well, a craft of some sort.
Or they are just drifters and marginal people. It depends on whether they activate their auxiliary Se in a positive way. These ISFPs have the ability to work hard, are responsible, and will just quietly and with a total lack of ego, go on in the name of some cause or deep flame type thing. There is something about love in this type, a true and deep love for some thing. Dedication to a craft, like all those great and persevering guitar players: Clapton, Hendrix, Harrison, Richards, Slash. Little ego and just a dedication to their craft and a deep and abiding love for it that eclipses all else.
It seems they can be jerks when their ISTJ id is running the show. Maybe this is where they can be bullies and judgmental of all the fuckups.
They can simultaneously be very moral, overly so, and then not care a fuck about some ENTJ bully being rough with others and them. They tend to respond and be receptive to tyrants. Maybe they need it because they have a phlegmatic aspect to them and they can’t get things going on their own too successfully. It’s like they need other people, a group, a clan, and they become very attached to their inherited clan. Like an absolute dedication to it.
In the rock world, many of them will actually eschew fame and popularity for sincerity in what they were doing in the first place. They will be the ones to leave, drop out when things get too circus-like. Examples: Izzy Stradlin of Guns N Roses comes to mind. The first bassist for for the band Tool maybe. He’s the one who wrote that really cool bass riff for the song Sober.
Many ISFPs are dropouts from things. They quit the system or group when it becomes too perverted and distorted from its pure beginnings. They just won’t have any part of it.
However, sometimes they are the very ones who will be used as tools for a group concern. I’m thinking of Gilby Clarke replacing Izzy in Guns N Roses. Trade one ISFP for another. And they will allow themselves to be used in a sense for a time. The smothered and the smotherer it seems is their lot. They can take a lot of abuse but watch out when they swing in the other direction. They will dish it out harshly too. Probaly a bunch of great facesitters these ones are.
Pacifists, masochists, victims of the system and yet perpetuators of its goals and values. Maybe that is the thing about Fi. It is indiscriminate in the values it dispenses. Or perpetuates. It will do whatever its beloved clan wants, the ones it is dependent on, whoever that group is. So, it probably depends on the group and values they inherit.
And then it seems some of them can be total rebels against their clan and side with the poor and unfortunate above all else. And they really mean it. Not like an ENFP or something in hoorah to a great appearance of mercy.
ISFP guys can be very sexy, smoldering, and come-hither. And very open to other’s energies kind of nodding with you, saying “yes uh-huh” but then not honoring anything deep. They are unlike INFPs in this respect who are much more genuinely open to everyone. Ne vs. Se. ISFPs size you up. They fuck with you, poke you, see what you are made of. In private one-on-one with them they might be very intimate and leading on, but then watch how their tune may change when they get in a group with their other buddies. They might make fun of you. Make digs at you. They don’t like clinginess. It’s like they are clingy but ashamed of it, at least the men. And it’s because of this dichotomy of femininity and masculinity in the type. They want to be cool and unaffected and like “Yeah, whatever, I could take it or leave it”. And they can in action. They present a dichotomy (trichotomy?) between a lover, a leaver, and a clinger.
As lovers they trump all other types. The men at least. They will do all those nasty things that a women wants. They understand women psychology. They understand desire. Forbidden fruits. They will go rogue. But, when they get back to their comrades, don’t expect them to acknowledge it. That was between you and them. And there is something of the traitor in the ISFP. Something mutinous and undependable. Like a weakness. They are both very strong and very weak. An ISFP can be absolutely weak, pathetic, and cowardly and yet watch out for their stings. Yes, there is something totally unbeholden here. They can have utter passion and desire and love and reciprocation. When you are with one of them in intimate circumstances, they can make you feel so special and you can adore them. But, then it can all dry up or change somehow and they will be gone – emotionally and physically. The classic slipping away lover. Without a word or explanation. Well, did they ever really say anything about promises? ISFPs insinuate, infer, but rarely state outright. They just make you feel a certain way. But, if they decide they have some reason for leaving (more like an impulse) or you repulsed them in some way. If you were uncool around them, they gone. Very shallow in a way.
They kind of see themselves ultimately as some rogue that only belongs to themselves at the end of the day. They are not whiny about their ideals being broken like some NF type. They are just hard in a way. And yet very soft and weak.
I think the astrology of an ISFP might be more important than usual because of this utter impressionability I am alluding to. Also, their inherited values, morals, clan, coming from their family. ISFPs seems like the classic violated-becoming-violator depending on how they were treated (imprinted) from the beginning. Because of their ISTJ id, they are very receptive to the correct and not correct ways of behaving, doing things etc. But since they are not particularly introspective they will just ingrain those mores and preserve and perpetuate them in some way.
However, there are breaking points for ISFPs in their lives. Points in their lives where they might reach where they do start to question all the shit they received. This is probably their Ni tertiary becoming active. It seems like they can live fully in a role or character and then just totally drop out from it. It’s like they are very receptive to the system but then they can become rebels and derelicts and tardy. It’s like “fuck it, let’s rock”.
This is them doing that opposite thing of totally not belonging to a clan and effectively wandering and roving around in nature or something, just totally turned off from society and all its etiquettes and even the etiquettes of their chosen clan. They just go mutinous. And it seems here they are very strong in a way, stronger than any other type – they are just beholden to…not a vision…well, a slight vision…but more just the principle of not belonging to anyone. One’s life being their own. We are in this circle of life and they can carry on from it in a way that is very admirable. Like being sly stoners on the outskirts of town. Not participating in karmic debts or gains anymore, realizing that all of life is just natural and amoral in the sense of man’s created and interpreted laws. Hard to bullshit or fool these ones. They are very grounded and persistent…and practical.
They can go homeless, set up a tent somewhere, and live very marginally. But, still be like mini-philosophers, stoner philosophers that have departed from the collective. And from there they can see it better. True, some of these ones can be very angry and carry on as silent agitators, but they aren’t pussies. They live by their code. Which is very idiosyncratic and they earned by the sweat of their brow. The thing about ISFPs they ain’t no natural intellectuals or ideologists. It wasn’t like they were born with a silver spoon in their mouth. They are natural workers. And they can work very hard when they are on the clock, as a natural instinct. But, when they off, they want to be left alone, to wander through their reveries. They want to get stoned and check out the world of nature and philosophy, like little children in this world. It’s all so new to them. How could they be jaded? How could they feel like they have seen it all, heard it all? The ISFP doesn’t feel like that.
Not an NF type. The ISFP doesn’t build up emotional systems. Ideal emotions. Ideal relationships. The Ideal is not something they know anything about. They don’t get all jumpy and frantic over “My relationship is not living up to my ideal”. Or “I’m not living up to my dreams and my visions.” ISFPs don’t start out like this. They have no dreams which they must live up to. They are more open to experience than an INFJ, for example. The ISFP doesn’t really care if they are understood or misunderstood. They don’t really care that much about who they are or their true place in the world. Not ambitious that way. They just kind of work with their presented experience. They don’t see that it could be any better or worse than what it was. It just is. Or was. It happened.
Why are you living here in this tent?
“It’s just where I decided I need to be. It feels right. It’s where I’m at now.”